fuck fireball !

here’s what i’ve been thinking of while going home after doing the groceries (you’ll soon understand why): if you could choose any spell up to level 5 to cast at will as a free action as a level 20 caster in your everyday life, what spell would that be? i can almost hear you: fireball, lightning, create minor undead (yes seri, we know you’re a necromancer), dispel magic, gaseous form…screw all of them. the only spell i would ever need would be tenser’s floating disk. this one just beats them all. it wins hands down. you know why?

because when you live two kilometers away from the nearest shop, and you have to buy food for 3 days (given that on sunday everything is closed and on monday it’s some national holiday and everything is closed again) and, not owning a car, you have to carry all that stuff back to your place. i once tried to carry 16 liters of orange juice and two full bags plus a small backpack and my lappy. i didn’t manage, so i’ve come up with an alternative. i’ve kidnapped a cart (or whatever they are called) like the one shown in the photo and pushed it till i reached the student dorm, then i abandoned it. (this is no easy job either as the cart doesn’t roll too well on grass and tilted surfaces and you also have to be on a lookout for the cops). also the downside is that once you reach your destination you have to find another similar cart in order to retrieve your coin (if you can’t…well you’ve just lost one euro!). of course buying a car would solve all my problems, but wouldn’t casting tenser’s floating disk be a more elegant solution. and it’s also handy when you have to move your fridge (oh boy) and a car won’t be of much help to you unless you can make it climb the stairs to the 10^th floor. (if someone would fix the elevator i would be thankful).

so, bottom line, you can keep all your fancy spells, i’ll just stick to tenser’s floating disk; this is the greatest spell ever devised, not counting evard’s black tentacles (this evard guy must have seen a lot of hentai to come up with this one).

batou’s tip of the day (totally unrelated): the only way to defeat in melee a pkf cyborg with a modular body and with his pain receptors turned off is to deal massive trauma to the brain unit!

tibi’s note: or you could just use your positron rifle, like pete did with the forvalaka (massive overkill !!!!). thanks god (the dm that is) it didn’t misfire!